People tell me that I have grown up a lot over the past few months, but my good friends, still act as if I am the irresponsible one, the screw up that can't be serious. I don't like the way, that I feel around them, I hate feeling inferior to anyone. I can't say that about feeling superior, but I only like that feeling when playing sports. I want to be equal to others.
I have grown up a lot. A year ago, if you told me that I would have the best semesters of my life, I wouldn't have believed you. Or that I would have been engaged y then have it called off, again I wouldn't have believed you.
I guess, I hate being around my old friends, because all I see is how I have, yet again, screwed my life up. How I had something awesome in Kate, but again I did something wrong.
I know this, no matter what, I am a better person because of Kate. She helped my focus on what is important in my life.
I realized that I have a lot of complications in my life, I am broken y I have no idea how to fix me. I put a mask on, so that those that know me don't see the pain that I am really in. I don't want to be a burden on others, I just want to be me y happy again.
2 comments:
My friend you've let your pain blind you. You see, we don't consider you to be the screwball. You are the one with the heart of gold. Know this, we don't blame you for anything. Things happen in life, good and bad. And we your friends don't hold blame to you. We love you and are here for you. So you can avoid us all you want, but when the time comes, I'll still be the friend to the man with the Heart of Gold.
hey just thinking of you so i wandered over to your blog. mike is in a bishopric on campus and there are two apartments of argentine girls and i wonder about how you are every time we talk (well, mike talks, my spanish is no tan bueno).
i hope things are going well.
Post a Comment