BYU Jokes

What do you call a 385 pound BYU coed?
Anorexic

Why did BYU coeds stop wearing wetsuits? (Those used for scuba diving)
They kept on getting harpooned.

If there was a BYU coed on one side of LaVell Edwards stadium, and a Ricks College (now BYU Idaho) coed on the other side, which would fall in first?
The stadium

What is the difference between Tinker Bell, the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus, and an ugly BYU coed?
Three of the four are fictitious.

How do you get 25 BYU coeds in a Volkswagen?
Throw an engagement ring in the back seat.

What do you call a pretty girl on the BYU campus?
A visitor

What is the difference between a garbage can and a BYU coed?
A garbage can gets taken out once a week.

What is the difference between an Orem Police Car and a BYU coed?
It takes two cop cars to block a street.

What is the difference between a spider and a BYU coed?
A spider has eight hairy legs.

Why did the LaVell Edwards Football Stadium go to Astroturf?
To keep the BYU Homecoming Queen from grazing.

Life

People want to know why I have no desire to date others. Well the one thing that no one really knows is that I have a hard time trusting people. Ever since I was a little one, I've been super friendly and someone who'll listen to anyone's problems, but you would never find me talking about mine to other people.

My Dad and Mom split up when I was 5 years old. I saw the pain and the suffering that my Mom experienced and how she has become a real reserved person. My little brother is the opposite of me, he has a hard time getting out and meeting new people, but once he does, he connects real fast with that person and there is a trust. I on the other hand, have no problem meeting new people and making new friends, the difference is I am not one to let anyone get to close to me.

In the past 8 months I've dated a couple of girls, the first one didn't last because I wouldn't allow myself to open up to her, she wanted to know how to help me and I just wouldn't t let her. The other was one person that I trusted completely. We would stay up most of the night talking and enjoying each others company. I honestly had no secrets from her, I would have done anything for her and in the end she left me. It really didn't affect me for that first couple of weeks, but it is harder now than it was at first. I understand how my mother feels now. She had a deeper relationship with my father, but to love someone and have them call it all off, I really never knew how much it would suck. Well that is why I do not want to date.

I know that to go on a date with a girl, doesn't mean anything, but if there is another and another after that I'm not ready to jump into anything because I'm just afraid of getting hurt yet again. So yeah., well hope all is well.

Worst Song Ever AKA Stalker Song

Stalker Lyrics

Whatcha’ doin’ tonight
I wish I could be a fly on your wall
Are you really alone
Who's stealin' your dreams
Why can't I bring you into my life
What would it take to make you see that I'm alive

[Chorus]

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invincible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I could just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible
(Wait..I already am)

Saw your face in the crowd
I call out your name
You don't hear a sound
I keep tracing your steps
Each move that you make
Wish I could read what goes through your mind
Wish you could touch me with the colors of your life

[Chorus]

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invincible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I can just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible
(Wait..I already am)

I reach out
But you don't even see me
Even when I'm scream out
Baby, you don't hear me
I am nothing without you
Just a shadow passing through...

[Repeat Chorus]

If I was invisible...
If I was invisible...
If I was invisible...
If I was invisible...
If I was invisible...
If I was invisible...

Yeah he should be shot for this song, well he just sucks and yeah.

Worst TV Show ever

Well this was a hard topic for me, since I really do not watch television shows unless I am interested. Jerry Springer is a horrible show due to what happens on that show and I know that a lot of people would want to write about Jerry, so I decided to look at Worst Tv show as horrible acting. The Show that wins is The Mighty Morphing Power Rangers. I will not lie, I was a huge fan of this show when I was just a little kid, but as I have grown older, I cannot stand it. The acting is horrible, also out of these 6 characters this was their 15 min to fame.

Pink

Pink what a wonderful color. I am fan of the color pink, mainly because I think that it looks good on girls.

Child Hood Memory/Snow

Define Childhood? I honestly cannot remember much of my childhood. Most of the memories that I have are not pleasant ones. One Memory that I have is going to Pokey to visit my grandma for Christmas. The whole family was there and yeah.

I was supposed to write this blog about snow last week. At work I heard people talk about snow being cold, miserable, etc. As I watched the snow fall at the BYU game I was filled with the feeling as a little kid while I tried to catch a flake or two in my mouth.
That night while I watched it fall to the ground I was filled with a feeling of peace. I came to the fact that snow is peaceful and romantic.
All I wanted to do, was wrap myself up in a blanket with a cup of hot chocolate while watching the snow gently floated to the ground.

What is wrong with me?

The other day I was taken into an office with my manager and her boss. They asked me if I like my job, I told them that I did, and after they asked me if I was happy, which I replied that I was. No later then 2 hours later I was afraid that I had either torn my ACL or my Hamstring playing football. While I was laying in bed that night I thought real hard if I did love my job and if I am truly happy. I came to the fact that I didn't lie to Em or Lindsey, but I wondered why I was so stressed 24/7?
Well I have had that on my mind all day today. I look at my mom and my heart goes out to her, I mean she is going through a hard time right now. She hasn't had a job since mid July and well her money is slowly diminishing. She is trying to put a strong front for me, but I can see her pain. The thing is I have been stressed because I don't have enough for school next semester and then if my mom doesn't have a job, who is going to pay for the house, food, utilities. I came to the fact that if I worked a full time job and then a part time, I could make enough to keep the two of us afloat until she was able to find a job.
So really I am apologizing to everyone if I have come across as, stressed, annoyed or just that I hate you. I don't hate people, I'm just trying to get out there and do what I need to do, to get through life.

Letter to me

I heard a song today that made me think. It was titled "Letters to me" by Brad Paisley. I was a song saying that oif her could send a letter to himself, he would do it when he was 17. If I had that chance what would I tell myself at that age?

The one thing that I would stress is money management, only because it would have helped me out in the long run with paying for school and not having to worry so much about work.
Another thing I would have told myself is not to write that letter to Kim. That letter was just a letter that raised my hopes up only to tear them down again.
There is not much that I would say, besides don't go to the club with your fam when you are older. Other than that I wouldn't want to tell myself anything, because that might change the future and I am happy with where I am at. Everything that happens, happens for a reason and we are supposed to learn from those lessons. So if we tell ourselves how it's going to happen, then what are we going to learn?
This is the letter that I would send myself at this point in time:

Dear Miles,
Buddy you are entering your last year in high school. I hope you don't skip school as much as I had us do. Learn how to study and save your money, the movie you will buy with that aren't worth it.
Also don't let your relationship with Kim get to be more than a friendship, she rips your heart out after telling you how much she loves you. Help a lot of other people and just keep doing what you are doing.
I know that you want to know more but your life until now isn't easy, but it is memorable. You will learn a lot about yourself and that will help you become a great person!
Sincerely,
Miles four years down the road.

People

Well today watching General Conference I was deeply touched during the talk of Elder Wirthlin, when Elder Nelson came up and stood behind him to help him with his shaking. It made me reflect on the people in my life that have always been there for me and have helped me out over the years to become the man that I am today.
The first person that I would like to give credit to is my mom. She has had to raise me and my little brother alone since I was 5 years old. She has always put the Lord first no matter what and has really taught me the importance of the gospel in my life. It has never been easy for her, but she has managed.
Second is my little brother. He taught many lessons growing up. He is one of the main reasons why you will never hear me swear now a days. I used to have a sailors mouth until I heard him swear. I pinned him against the wall and told him that he was never aloud to say those words. He proceeded to state, but you use them. He is my best friend and without him I fell lonely at times. We have always been there for each other since the divorce of our parents. My mission was the longest time that we have ever spent apart from each other.

My teammates are others that have been there for me and still are there when I need someone to talk to. No one will be able to understand how we have come to rely on each other over the time we spent together. They have become my brothers and I count them as family. I would do anything for any of them if they ever needed me too.

Another big part was my cross country coach Phil Olsen. Anyone that has run for coche, will tell you that he really is a great man of honor and of word. He does what he needs to do to teach his athletes important values of honesty, treating others and how to have fun. One thing that he always stressed was the importance of school work. He would have us put that first no matter what.

There have been many others that have played a role in my life and I don't have enough time to single ya'll out. But thank you and I'll always be here if you ever need someone to talk to or just need a helping hand with something.

My randomized album to my life

SOUNDTRACK TO MY LIFE

Here are the rules:

1. Open your music library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)

2. Put it on shuffle

3. Press play

4. For every question, type the song that's playing

5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool... and alot of the songs fit with the setting.

Opening Credits:"I wanna be a rockstar" -Nickelback

Waking up:"Mack the knife" - Frank Sinatra

Work: "My next 30 years" - Tim McGraw

First Day At School: "Carribean Blue" - Enya

Fridays: "Daniel my Brother" - Elton John

Dating: "Rodeo" - Garth Brooks

Falling In Love: "Keep me close"- Chris Daughtry

Sports: "We are the Champions from We will Rock you"

Fight Song: "Even Cowboys love Rock and Roll" - Chris Ledoux

Breaking Up: "Wrinkles"- Diamond Rio

Prom: "The Sweetest Goodbye"- Maroon 5

Life:"With Arms Wide Open"- Creed

Mental Breakdown:"Kids and Heroes"- Bouncing Souls

Driving:"Dead Wrong"- The Fray

Flashback:"That's Amore"- Dean Martin

Getting back together: "Night Swim"- Dashboard Confessional (live)

Wedding:"Hero (live)"- Enrique Inglesias

Birth of Child:" I miss my friend"- Darrly Worley

Growing Old: "Myself" - Maroon 5

Final Battle:"Matt Foley's Speech on Pot"- Matt Foley SNL Chris Farley

Death Scene:"Beat it"- Micheal Jackson

Funeral Song:"The Great Escape" - Boys like girls

End Credits:"Hurt" - Jonny Cash

Howdy

Well I'm still trying to figure out how blogging works. The other night I was talking to my mom when she told me that my grandma will have to have kemotheraphy again. The last time she went through that kind of treatment was 8 months ago and the cancer is now back. This will be the third time around receiving those kind of treatments.
This picture was taken in July after our family reunion. My grandma is one of the most amazing women I have ever come to know.
These past few months have been hard on her, not being able to do the things that she always has been able to do. She has never needed a lot of help around the house until recently and it has been hard her her to accept it.
I wish I could quit school and my job to live up there with her and just listen to the stories of her life. I hope that I am able to visit her.

Is needing sleep

I was up until 2:30am last night writing a paper on the song titled "How to Save a Life" by the Fray. while going through the song line by line, and reading what was said about it on line, it has made me think what more can I do to reach out to someone who needs a helping hand.
There are many people who go through life without the support that I have received from my family and friends, now it is my turn to turn that around and give it back to everyone else.

Just one of those days

The one thing that bugs me is the way that females expect everything from us males. Over the past few months, all that I have heard is that we need to ask girls out on dates. At that time I had a girl friend. I have a couple of friends that were also saying the same thing about themselves, that guys don't ask them out.
Well in the past 4 days I asked both of them out, different days and times, but they just looked at me and told me that they were busy doing things with their friends and that they wouldn't be able to go on a date.
Well if you are going to turn down a date when asked on one, then why complain? Be willing to go with someone who isn't that dream guy that you want to ask you out. I've come to the fact that girls want to be asked out, they just do not want to go on dates. If this true, why do we waste our time asking girls out only to be rejected?